Today, I turn 22. To be perfectly honest, I used to dread leaving my teenage years, thinking that it would be boring and serious and mature when I finally hit my 20s. But looking back, I was just being silly. Life has more to offer when you are on your 20s, and although the pressure of making the most out of my youth is starting to get into me, I know, I’ll survive.
This past year, I’ve had way too many challenges crammed up in 12 months. Losing a job, losing myself, finding a job for me to get lost again. Three different jobs, three different companies, each resignation becoming more of a failure than the first one — I honestly thought that it was the end of me. Up until this point, I still sometimes see myself as a quitter, a failure, somebody who wouldn’t stand something uncomfortable for too long. Just when the chances try to pull me down, I decided to go against life’s direction. I decided to make my own choices and be happy about it.
Despite all the challenges and all the tears that I’ve shed this past year, I still feel very blessed. Blessed to have Mark beside me (we’ve been together for more than six years now), blessed to start a business that makes me inspired and happy, blessed to get in to a dream job of some sort by writing in When in Manila, blessed to have a family that supports me still, and blessed to find friends who are willing to listen to my long whiny rants about life. Although I can’t really say that I have a solid group of friends like Ted, Lily, Marshall, Barney, and Robin (I still hope to find them someday though hehe), at least I have some people whom I could vent out my feelings to, and people I could have fun with.
Although being 22 marks a new start for me, my birthday was still pretty uneventful. I spent more than six hours lying in bed and sleeping, and there is nothing significant that I received from my friends or my family. Mark gave me my third Coelho book, something that I’ve been looking forward to read since forever, and he also granted one of my biggest wishes this year: wait until midnight and blow a birthday candle. It’s petty, I know, but I haven’t really had a proper birthday cake since I was 18, complete with all the candles and the singing and stuff. I know it could have been better if I was able to wait with a couple of friends, but I can’t think of anyone who values me enough to waste their Saturday night with me (sobs) or, all the more, plan a surprise of some sort. Being with Mark was still awesome, nevertheless, and his presence definitely made me the happiest… as always.
I don’t know about you, but I’m feeling 22~
Even if April 13th was not as fun as I wanted it to be, I had a blast a day before my real birthday, though. I get to hangout and third wheel (haha no) with some of my wonderful college friends, Zazing and Babet, and I also get to go swim the night away with Mark at Ace Water Spa. It was a rather simple celebration, no booze, not much friends, but I’m still happy. I also got myself a haircut, and I finally bade goodbye to four years worth of hair! Not really, but I hope you get the picture. Hehe.
Zaza, Babet, and I
At home, my mom prepared some carbonara, pizza, and ice cream to celebrate. I’ve been trying to lose weight for the past few weeks, but man, these foods are tempting. I wasn’t able to take a picture, but one thing’s for sure, all those foods are etched on my mind and digested on my big tummy. In addition from all the fattening “cuisines” that I have ingested yesterday and today, I’ll also be making an oreo cheesecake tomorrow as a post-birthday gift to myself. Not really, no, since it’ll be most likely devoured by my parents and my brother, but I’ll be making it anyway as my way of saying thanks for their support on my time outs and soul searching moments.
Now that I’m 22, I know that things would not get any better, that challenges will always be around the corner, but I am hoping that all my learning from the past years will help me deal with everything in a calmer manner. I hope that I get to finally hit my 50kg. dream weight (haha), and I wish to travel more in the coming months. I dream of exploring the world and finding myself lost and in love with places that I visit, with people that I meet, with experiences that I’ll be going through. I hope for a stronger relationship with God, and a happier love life with Mark. I wish that my family and I would be able to go through all the financial challenges ahead of us, and that my brother find happiness on his chosen course. I also hope that my new career venture would make me happy, and that our humble business continue to boom. I wish that I’ll be finally able to volunteer for a cause, and I hope that I continue to write and grow as a writer of some sort. Most of all, I only wish to be stronger, wiser, and happier on my 22nd year. I’m no longer as young as I was, but as the saying goes, you only live once and there’s nothing better than to live in the moment.
To a happier year ahead! Cheers!